Wednesday 12 December 2018


Just under two weeks til christmas and I am feeling it. Does anyone else get like this when it starts getting closer to the big day?

I feel like everything has to be ‘perfect’ , but if I’m honest , the more ‘perfect’ I try and make it , the more that goes wrong! And I don’t enjoy it.

I always feel like the girls haven’t got enough or we haven’t made the house look Christmassy enough for the kids. We’ve not done enough baking , or had enough mince pies.

It sounds ridiculous doesn’t it , especially when you write out all the worries , there really is more to Christmas then that. Last year Alessia was in hospital all day and luckily they let her out at 8pm- so you can understand why I have this obsession with having the ‘perfect’ Christmas.

I am also self employed now , so If I don’t work then I don’t get paid so I am trying to get as much work done hopefully before the 20th so I can have some time of to just enjoy my family and relax!.

This morning whilst Nila had her nap, I have written out a massive list of things I need to get done, so there’s no forgetting anything - I did forget crackers one year! I was devestated!. I had a massive clear out of stuff yesterday too.

Also had the biggest clean known to man so I can focus on work today and getting organised so there is no last minute worries. I do suffer from anxiety so that doesn’t help !, but I’m hoping my list of tasks will help me out.

I’m hoping to get everything done by the weekend. It’s a big list, I’m not going to lie, but I think once you’ve sorted a to do plan, tasks are easy to complete . It’s when there racing in your head 90mph at 3am is where it all goes wrong.

As long as I have my little family around me and I see the girls smiles on their faces - all the worries melt away, but until there I will probably still be worrying like normal !:)

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